Heres what happens during a totally legal $330 vagina massage

Publish date: 2024-08-13

From deep tissue to hot stone, there isn’t much the massage industry has not offered.

But the latest craze is for the most intimate treatment yet.

The yoni massage is exclusively for women and focuses on a lady’s private parts.

But the treatment comes at a price – an hour-long session can cost up to £250 ($330).

Here’s what happened when Nilufer Atik put her inhibitions aside to give the yoni massage a try:

Name a type of massage and the chances are I’ve tried it. For me, there’s nothing better than lying semi-comatose on a kitten-soft bed while a stranger pummels the giant knots from my back.

I was even once held upside down by a yogi in India and massaged by his feet.

I stand with my eyes closed, feeling awkward as Lisa lifts off my baggy T-shirt and peels down my underwear while breathing heavily on my neck.

 - Nilufer Atik

I’d thought that was a pretty intimate experience, until I heard about the yoni massage.

I must admit I was curious and confused all at once but my overriding feeling was I had to give it a try.

Yoni is the Sanskrit word for vagina and means “sacred space”.

The idea of the massage is to release physical and emotional blockages and free sexual energy to enable the recipient to become more in tune with her body.

Some women experience an orgasm but that isn’t the goal.

Having never been comfortable with my own nudity, it was with some trepidation that I booked in a session with a London agency that specializes in sensual massage.

All of its masseurs are women and the one assigned to me was 28-year-old yoni expert Lisa*.

Before the main event takes place, she tells me: “An ordinary massage is about releasing the muscles. A sensual massage like yoni is about awakening the body and seeing what’s there to enable pleasure.”

Donning her white overcoat and black trousers, Lisa sets about creating the right ambience for my massage, which involved dimming the lights, lighting aromatic candles and putting on soothing music.

We begin with an undressing ceremony.

By the time she’s moved her hands to the front of my crotch, I’m so relaxed she could have massaged me with a Brillo pad and I wouldn’t have noticed.

 - Nilufer Atik

I stand with my eyes closed, feeling awkward as Lisa lifts off my baggy T-shirt and peels down my underwear while breathing heavily on my neck.

It’s strange being undressed by a woman — the last time that happened was when my best friend put me to bed after I overdid it on a drunken night out.

Lisa starts by massaging my feet, rubbing every toe between her fingers with aromatherapy oils.

So far, so ordinary.

She works her way up the back of my legs and I start to feel blissfully relaxed when suddenly I feel a hand slip between my buttocks.

OK, now this doesn’t feel so ordinary. Lisa proceeds to slide her palms up and down the backs of my thighs, gradually edging towards the gap between my legs.

I squirm a little but she tells me to breathe deeply and focus on the feeling — and it works.

By the time she’s moved her hands to the front of my crotch, I’m so relaxed she could have massaged me with a Brillo pad and I wouldn’t have noticed.

I was initially apprehensive about letting a woman touch me “down there”, but my inhibitions evaporate the more the massage progresses.

Even when Lisa asks me to turn over and works her hands down from my belly to my privates, I feel caressed rather than sexed-up. None of it feels intrusive at all.

She softly presses a cupped palm on to my nethers and makes circular motions to “get the blood flowing”, using her hands, fingers and even her breath to warm, soothe and knead.

I am surprised to find that, instead of becoming aroused, I just feel tingly and blissful all over.

When Lisa announces my time is up I feel a combination of relief and disappointment.

Relief because it hasn’t been as embarrassing as I’d imagined, but disappointment that the light-headed giddiness and tingly feeling is now subsiding.

Is this meditation or just masturbation?

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